Tag Archives: thaumasmus

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

American history of rough. There was the American Revolution. There was the wanton murder of Native Americans. There was the depravity of slavery. There was the Great Depression. There was Word war II and Third Reich.

Now there is Donald Trump: The cosmic blight. The maker of massive shit stains. The stinking wave of blood-flecked vomit. The end of democracy.

It’s only a matter of time before Trump’s supporters will have the opportunity to yell “Guillotine, Guillotine, Guillotine” as Hilary Clinton is marched down Wall Street.

All that I know right now is that mental illness can have a starring role in politics. Compassion, sanity and honesty are given minor bit parts by the Mad One as he may plot democracy’s demise with Putin, Xi Jinping, the Koch brothers, and the NRA.

The internment camps are open for business.

Beware!

Their purpose may be expanded to accommodate dissenters and other “undesirables.”

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

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Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

One Refugee’s Story*

I finally got to Berlin after days of walking and taking buses and trains from somewhere else.

I awoke behind a fence with hundreds of bald-headed men covered in tattoos outside the fence, their right arms outstretched, chanting a German greeting.

I waved back and thanked them.  As I turned around I exclaimed “I am in a refugee camp!”

There were 100s of shiny sweet-smelling Porta-Potties glistening like pearls strung on a royal strand.

“Oh!” I exclaimed.

Jars and jars and jars of Nutella cleverly arranged in the shape of my homeland!

100s of rolls of soft Swiss toilet tissue–a paper Matterhorn nearly touching the blue German sky, silhouetted by hills of freeze-dried spargles forming the backdrop for 100s of galvanized barrels overflowing with foaming beer, sweet apple cider, and peppermint schnapps.

Dazed, I said to myself “Anyway, I am tired of eating flattened squirrels by the roadside, and drinking from small shallow puddles.”

Now, I will never go back to where I came from.

Already, I have learned the German phrase for “I am in paradise.” One of the tattooed bald men taught it to me: Ich gehör da nicht zu.

So, whenever I feel joy and want to express my gratitude I smile broadly and yell: Ich gehör da nicht zu.

The tattooed bald men smile too and cheer me on.

Truly, I have found a new home!

Ich gehör da nicht zu!

Heil Kanzlor Merkel!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)


*Translated by Prof. Hans Schtudentlickenheinerbachen, Hegel Professor of Other Languages, U. of Putzhaben.

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

I had no idea! You’re not my wife?  This isn’t my car? These aren’t my pants? Where did this Barbie Doll come from?  Captain Morgan? I’ve never been in the navy!

Stop the car!  I’m going to be sick!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

Huh? What? OMG! No way! Am I dreaming? It can’t be! There must be LSD in my MU TEA! You actually got me a Father’s Day card? You used your own money? I need to sit down. Call 911. Ha! Ha! Just kidding! Call CNN.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

It is totally amazing that Mitt Romney was ever the Bain of anybody’s existence. Thousands of workers fired? Come on, he’s such a smiley, well-groomed guy.  I’d trust him with your life.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

Wow! That pile of dirty dishes has to be a world record!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

I can’t believe how much oil has poured into the Gulf of Mexico since April! Can it really be 12 million gallons? All that oil from one blown-out well? What a disaster!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Thaumasmus

Thaumasmus (thau-mas’-mus): To marvel at something rather than to state it in a matter of fact way.

I am amazed by your “So what?” attitude toward the miserable consequences of so many failed decisions!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)