Category Archives: exuscitatio

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).


How many of you have had your underwear shrink? Mine claimed to be shrink proof on the package. I had total faith in their assertion. After all, they’re a big company with a pleasing name: “100% Cotton.” What could inspire more confidence than 100%? 100% of anything is all of it. I’ve trusted cotton since I’ve worn Levi’s as a toddler. They told you to buy them big because they would shrink. They were honest.

I don’t know about you, but my briefs have become a cotton postage stamp with 2 leg holes. When I put them on, it’s like I’m wearing Ken’s undies and Barbie is standing there laughing at me.

Underpants are the closest thing to you aside from your skin. Closer than your girlfriend. Closer than your mother. Closer than your boss! Do you want what’s closest to you chafing and painfully squeezing your private parts? Are you with me? Together we can make this right. Together we can get the underpants bosses to stop crushing our pride by making our underpants one size smaller, after they shrink, than they say on the package. What’s worse, these underpants are made in China by Communists. Are they trying make us sterile so there will be no soldiers when they invade us with their depraved Army, conquer us and make us slaves—probably working in an underpants factory to further their cause.

Again, are you with me? We must confiscate all of the 100% cotton underpants in the United States. We must burn them in the middle of Pennsylvania Avenue to show our President that these shrinking underpants are un-American and unacceptable. We can do this. The confiscation and transportation of Chinese shrinkys will become our life’s work. Nothing shall deter us as we harvest the 100% cotton underpants and bring them to the bonfire. We will not be duped by Chinese agents giving away free underpants at the mall. We will save America! Let’s go! Down with constricting underpants!


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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Excusitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).


I am totally sick of having to have Mr. Tallyman tally my bananas before I can go home to my wife and son Harry. It’s patronizing! It’s demeaning! It’s degrading. I know how many bunches I picked, working all night long—Banana Spiders falling on my bare shoulders and big black rats circling around my bare feet gnawing at the banana trees.

If I have to call out to Mr. Tallyman to tally my bananas one more time, and stand here wasting my time waiting for him as the hot sun rises or the rain falls, I am going to stick a green banana up Mr. Tallyman’s ass and go home. Is anybody else with me? Does anybody else want to be a little more free? Why do we have to wait around for the damn tally? When we’re done picking, we can do the tally, go home, and pick up our pay tomorrow. To hell with Mr. Tallyman and Damn you Del Monte too!

YOU are a man! I am a man! WE are men! TOGETHER we are strong. Do not fear the Tallyman! Do not fear Del Monte! Do your own tally and go home!


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. There is also a Kindle edition available for $5.99.

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).

My anger isn’t going away. It is never going away as long I’m lied to every day by the feckless lout named Trump. It was bad enough when he lied about his accomplishments–taking credit for everything good and shifting the blame for everything bad. Then came coronavirus, a real tangible measurable threat to the well being–even the lives–of 100s of 1,000s of people. But the piece of shit still lied–he told us it was contained, that it would be over in a few weeks, that it was like the flu, and more bullshit. Since people started dying and his lies were blown away by the force of nature, he’s rolled out a new array of lies, about his previous lies.

He is the hoax. He is disloyal. He is devious. He needs to go–to somewhere where we won’t see him or hear his lying wheeze ever again. Prison?

Yell it with me: Lock him up! Lock him up! . . .

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. There is also a Kindle edition available for $5.99.

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).

Does anybody out there have a brain? Every day we listen to President Trump, or read his Tweets, hoping for something that instills confidence in his leadership. Instead we get words worthy of a dumpster.

Why is this happening? Is it on purpose? Is it some kind of rude trick? I’m sick of it and want it to stop. The big question is: How do we make it stop? I think we need to wait for the next presidential election, unless impeachment’s a possibility (which it isn’t).

Anyway, in the meantime we should organize under “Stop the Stupid Trump Talk” and see what kind of difference we might make.

Who’s with me? Ivanka? Jared?

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. There is also a Kindle edition available for $5.99.

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).

How many times are we going to let them get away with it? I am sick and tired of the same old excuses and attempts to “quiet us down” like we’re small children.

You know what I want, and it’s what WE want too!

I want my chocolate milk!

I want chocolate milk with breakfast!

I want chocolate milk with lunch!

I want chocolate milk with dinner!

I want chocolate milk!

Are you with me!!?

WE want chocolate milk?

Yes, We want Chocolate milk!

All right!

Let’s crowd around the med dispensary window and show these zookeepers who’s boss!

Chocolate milk!

All power to the people!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 1 face chord? 10 face chords? 1,000,000 face chords? It’s time to stop asking “if” and get those lazy woodchucks chucking wood! I see too many waddling across the roadways of America! I see too many senselessly squished by motor vehicles! I see too many grazing on gardens when they could be doing something productive–like chucking wood!

I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to start rounding them up and putting them to work chucking wood in the Great American Northwest forests! And after we get the woodchucks chucking, we’ll go after the beavers–they can cut wood! Instead of destroying the environment with their sloppy looking dams and mosquito infested ponds, they can be put to work with woodchucks: Beavers chew and the chucks chuck!

Chew and chuck! Chew and chuck! Chew and chuck!

Let the People run the sawmills!

Make the woodchucks and beavers do the rest!

Are you with me!!?

  • Post your own exuscitatio on the “Comments” page!

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Exuscitatio

Exuscitatio (ex-us-ci-ta’-ti-o): Stirring others by one’s own vehement feeling (sometimes by means of a rhetorical question, and often for the sake of exciting anger).

How many times do we have to be told “Not yet”? How many times do we have to stand outside in the cold and be told “Wait your turn”? Well, it is your turn–it’s always your turn when truth and justice open the door wide so everybody has a chance to go on through. Let’s call on truth and justice to open that door–let’s hope they come and hold it open so we don’t have to tear it off its hinges!

  • Post your own exuscitatio on the “Comments” page!

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).