Category Archives: mesarchia

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.


I started lifting weights. I started lifting my spirits. I started lifting myself! I made a contraption like a swing on a pulley. I would sit on the swing and pull myself up by the swing’s rope. I called it “Joey’s Pull-a-Muscle.” I got to the point where I would time each pull, trying to break my own record each time. In order to increase the challenge, I decided to put on weight by eating cake and pie and three large double-cheese Domino pizzas per day, with sausage, bacon, meatballs, and smoked shad toppings. After 6 months I went from 220-340 pounds. I bought a 5x spa towel and made Tick Tok videos of myself when I wasn’t lifting or eating. I got 600 likes for my “Seduction” video—in the video I slowly lifted the hem of my spa towel while wagging my finger and shaking my head “No.”

Then I met a girl on Tick Tok. She said she had been watching me and would love to come over to my apartment and pull my rope some afternoon. What she said sounded slightly sexually suggestive, but I was game for anything. So, I invited her over the following day at 1:00 pm. I would try to take a shower in preparation. Unfortunately, I got stuck in the shower. I stood there, wedged in, all night long.

Then, at exactly 1:00 pm there was a knock on my door. I yelled to her to come in. I guided her to the bathroom with my yelling. When she arrived at the bathroom door, I was stunned. She was wearing one of those inflatable a sumo wrestler suits, fully inflated. She pulled me out of the shower. I put on my spa towel and we sat on the couch. By the way: she was quite attractive: black hair, brown eyes, nice ears, straight teeth, small feet. That’s all I could see with the sumo suit covering her up.

“Would you let me pull your rope now?” she asked. Then it hit me—I had seen her face in the newspaper! Her name was Beth Grisley and she was being sought in connection with the brutal stabbing and dismemberment of the professional wrestler Two-Ton Tommy Tompowski! I stood in front of the open window and yelled “Come and get me!” She grabbed a steak knife off the coffee table and came running at me. At the last second I stepped aside. She would’ve flown out the window, but the inflated sumo suit wedged in the window. I called 911 and soon everything was settled.

As the dust settled, I thought to myself, never again will I invite a stranger over to my apartment to pull my rope. Never again will I make Tick Tok videos. As soon as I lose 100 pounds, never again will I get wedged in the shower.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.


Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.


I am lost and struggling to find my way. I am lost and hoping to find the trail. I am lost and I look toward the sky to find the North Star. I look, I seek, I hunt, I struggle, all to no avail. Now, I will make a bed of pine boughs and wait for dawn. It is a warm summer night. I will be ok . In the morning I will walk toward the rising sun, eat some berries, and drink from the crystal clear creek. I will survive.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

I thought I was going crazy looking at little men sitting on my foot. I thought I was going really nuts with the little men pointing at me and laughing. I thought I was going loony tunes for sure hanging out with little men playing acoustic guitars. Then I realized I had just spent two hours watching Fox News.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

I was looking for a piece of paper. I was anxious for a piece to write on. I was in need of a piece to start my butterfly census project. I would be counting the Monarchs, Yellow Swallowtails and Black Swallowtails. For one week, I would go out every day at 2.00p.m. and track them.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

I can’t say for sure where my culinary interest is tending; tending as as it is toward fast food.

I can’t say whether my culinary interest is best served up as Baconators; Baconators three beef patties high laced with crisp bacon, soaked by melting cheese.

I can’t say whether your interest in me will continue; continue as I become obese from obsessively consuming bags of fat dribbling 940 calorie burgers.

Will you feed me when I can’t move any more?

Bless you.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

Truth is a chain wound around your soul, eternally binding your will to be otherwise.

Truth is a dagger driven deep into your soul, eternally excising ignorance, and tragically bleeding out its hot misty bliss.

Truth is an immortal warrior that recruits your soul, eternally marching it toward its unwavering goal, achieving victory on wine-colored fields drenched by the wounds of infidels.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

Truth is a picture of hope fulfilled, eternally titled “The End.”

Truth is a parasite attached to your soul, eternally weakening its will to let go.

Truth is a red-eyed pig eternally oinking in the barnyard of your mind.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Mesarchia

Mesarchia (mes-ar’-chi-a): The repetition of the same word or words at the beginning and middle of successive sentences.

I was their leader, after all, and I was true to their cause. I was their hope, after all, and their hope was a treasure that was made safe by our dream. I was their inspiration, after all, and together we made the world a better place; we rejoiced in the spirit of our dream’s fulfillment. I was, after all, theirs–all theirs.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)