Category Archives: meiosis

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.


You know, I’ve been biting into these things, eating all kinds of cakes and pies, drinking their juice and alcohol made from the juice. They make a big part of my state’s economy profitable, but still, I think they are way overrated. It isn’t popular, but I call them “crapples” for what their cultivation does to us. “Huh?” you ask.

You’ve heard of Adam & Eve, right? The story of what happened in the Garden of Eden should be enough to prompt the outlawing of crapples. Satan hangs out in apple orchards and the fruit section of grocery stores. Every time you eat an apple you are doing Satan’s bidding and will probably become a prostitute, bank robber or heroin addict, scraping the bottom of life’s barrel, catching diseases, going insane, and going to prison. You may say “I’ve partaken of apples all my life and I’m not a prostitute, bank robber, or drug addict.” To that I say, Satan is clever— just wait—keep consuming crapples and you will fall. Believe me: it is inevitable. Look at Jeffery Dahmer—he loved crapples and ate them all of his life. And then, one day he became a serial killer and switched over to eating people. Satan rejoiced. Or look at Charles Manson: he religiously followed Satan’s apple a day dictum. Satan rejoiced.

So there. You risk damnation every time you bite into a beautiful red Cartland, a crisp Red Delicious, or a bright green Granny Smith. Do not please Satan. Stop consuming all crapple products and you will help thwart his plan. Save yourself! Put down that apple and pick up a nectarine or an avocado!


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.


You can take your engagement ring and shove it. It’s a cigar band for bozos. After what you did to me, I’m outta here.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.

What happened to the United States of America–that little blip on humanity’s radar screen? Was it actually swallowed whole by a grotesque, fat, blond man who was happy to see it disappear so he could replace it with the The Disjointed States of Confusion that we’re living in now?

Well, I for one miss the good old USA. I hope enough other people do too, so on Election Day we can get our country back from fatso.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.

That so-called “Presidential Executive Office” is looking more and more like a “Used Car Sales Office” that’s failing to meet its quota. 

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Buy a print edition of The Daily Trope! The print edition is entitled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. A Kindle edition is available for $5.99.

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.

Imagine, calling a string of commonplace cliches “plagiarism.” Melania was simply stating truisms–the kinds of things that common sense dictates when you’re talking about your parents’ advice and influence, raising children, and being an American. It’s like saying “I love you” is plagiarized because it’s been said countless times before!

What do I have to do now, think of a new way to say “I love you” because there’s a Valentine’s card that already says it?

I’ll tell you what! Nobody’s going to make me find a different way to say “I love you,”even if you call me a plagiarist! I love you is I love you. How else do I say it?

Speaking from the heart is not plagiarism, no matter how much it may sound like what other people say when they speak from the heart.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.

It was time to pan fry the catfish I caught in the river across from the “Jack and the Beanstalk” fertilizer factory!

This was no ordinary catfish and pan frying was not exactly what I was going to do. The fish was so big that I had use my front loader to scoop it up and drive it home from the river. As soon as I got it home, I built a huge bonfire, laced with petrochemicals to get it going fast. I cleaned the fish with a chainsaw. Then, I lowered the front loader’s bucket into the roaring flames. When it was red hot, I raised it out of the fire, backed up and scooped up the fish. Then, with my mouth watering I pulled forward and lowered little kitty-kitty-fish into the eight-foot flames.

The explosion blew apart my front loader. I woke up in a drainage ditch across the street from my home. All of its windows were shattered.

I was soaking wet. I was covered with wriggling mosquito larvae and blown up catfish parts.  My ears were ringing, my nose was bleeding and a charred pectoral fin the size of a canoe paddle was sticking out of the left cheek of my bashed up butt.

I felt a pang of hunger. It triggered the first thought that squeezed through my swollen brain: “Beaver Brand Tatar Sauce.” Inspired, I dragged myself across the street, over the curb, over the broken glass, into the smoking double-wide, toward what was left of my kitchen. “Beaver, beaver, beaver” I moaned.

The next thing I knew, the angel with the black and yellow stun gun . . .

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

Meiosis

Meiosis (mei-o’-sis): Reference to something with a name disproportionately lesser than its nature (a kind of litotes). This term is equivalent to tapinosis.

We’ve got to cross those mountains to get to California?  Hey–they’re just a couple of snow-capped bumps on the trail. Right?

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).