Exergasia (ex-er-ga’-si-a): Repetition of the same idea, changing either its words, its delivery, or the general treatment it is given. A method for amplification, variation, and explanation. As such, exergasia compares to the progymnasmata exercises (rudimentary exercises intended to prepare students of rhetoric for the creation and performance of complete practice orations).
I was stuck in the passing lane. I was going to die. How come nobody would let me back in the travel lane? I had put on my blinker and everything. I even blew my horn, although I considered it impolite. The people in the travel lane paid no attention me—staring straight ahead and bobbing their heads, and lip synching to the music on their car radios. It was deeply troubling, vexing, anger inducing, worrying.
I was getting worried. “Freaking out” is a popular catchphrase for getting worried, but is a bit more intense. “Panic” puts the proverbial icing on the cake—it is a kind of insanity where your decision making skills go flying out the window—you close your eyes, scream, and wet your pants: the end is literally in sight: a bomb on your front porch. A fire in your living room. A heart attack at the Mall. Dinner with your in- laws—ha ha.
Why am I making jokes? I’m going to die. But, I’m starting to wonder if I’m wrong about that. I’ve been stuck in the passing lane for 800 miles. I’m still alive. I have a quarter-tank of gas and15 bags of “Funions” I picked up at Cliff’s when I gassed up. I also bought 10 “Boogie Woogie Jungle Bang” energy drinks.
Suddenly my car jerked violently forward. A guy wearing a Yankees hat was wiping my window with a towel. I was in a car wash! The man with the towel motioned me to put my window down. I did. He told me I had been stuck in the “Sparkle Wash Car Wash” for 12 hours. “We had a Rust preventer malfunction that shut the whole car wash down. I couldn’t get to your car to free you, and when I waved my towel at you, you just sat there staring straight ahead, like some kind of zombie—like you were having a seizure.
I couldn’t account for my “seizure.” I counted 10 empty “Boogie Woogie Jungle Bangs” open on the seat beside me, along with a pile of empty bags of “Funions.” I figured my death ride in the fast lane was some kind of hallucination caused by drinking all the “Boogie Woogie Jungle Bang.” I have no idea what made me drink it. Then, I remembered! I was on my way to a job interview. I had read in “Life Tricks” magazine that dynamism is the most important behavior to display in job interviews. The energy drink would do the trick. But, I never got a chance to display anything. I O.D.’d on energy drink and got stuck in the Sparkle Wash Car Wash in a zombie trance.
POSTSCRIPT
The car wash gave me a lifetime pass with free undercarriage rust inhibited for what they had put me through. It included unlimited use of the vacuum out in the parking lot.
Definitions courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu
Daily Trope is available in an early edition on Amazon in paperback under the title of The Book of Tropes for $9.95. It is also available in Kindle format for $5.99.