Tag Archives: ellipsis

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.


I woke up in a pool of blood. I did not know where I was. As I got up with my pants dripping blood on the floor, I thought “How could I sleep in a pool of blood? Gross! What an idiot.” I didn’t know what to do. I sat on the couch for awhile, it soaked up some of the blood. I decided to go outside and sit by what looked like a swimming pool and let the sunshine dry up the rest—to make it crusty and maroon-colored. After about a half-hour, I was dry. I decided to go to a laundromat. I called an Uber and told them I wanted to go to Doozy Duds laundromat. The driver took one look at me and said “What the fu*k happened to you?” I told him I worked in a slaughterhouse and its laundry facility was temporarily out of order. I told him it was my nephew’s birthday and I needed clean clothes to wear, and ironically, my home washing machine had broken down the day before. By the way, I was wearing all white from my job modeling hazmat suits. So, the driver bought my story. Who wouldn’t?

The Weehawken Doozy Duds was open 24-7. I loved the girl who worked there. She was skinny with big bags under her eyes, long black hair, flat chest and a butt like two watermelons resting side-by-side. I had vivid dreams about her butt, circling around my head, talking to me, jiggling, sitting on my lap. It was creepy and beautiful at the same time. It was . . . bliss. She called herself “Sudsy.” I thought that was really creative.

Here I was, outside Doozy Duds watching Sudsy through the window. I opened the door and went in. She gasped and said, “You’re covered with blood. We’ve got to get you cleaned up. I’ve got some stain remover that will do the trick. Take off your clothes. We have to soak them.” I tore off my clothes and threw them to Soapy. She told me to get in one of the zinc hand-washing tubs so she could bathe me. She locked up Doozy Duds.

We soaked my clothes for 2 hours, and then, washed them and dried them. We slept in a basket of laundry that night. It smelled sweaty and so did we. In the morning, Sudsy reopened Doozy Duds. My memory was coming back. I went to International House of Pancakes for breakfast. I ordered the ‘Double-Heeman Whaky Jacks.” When I picked up my knife I saw myself stabbing an elderly woman wearing lipstick, dressed in her underwear, and leaning on a walker. She was at least 80 years old. My god—I recognized her! It was my grandfather’s sister Bernice! I ran out of I-HOP. I was a murderer, a fugitive from justice. I had killed a personal blood relative—and I didn’t know why.

I picked up Sudsy on my motorcycle and we took off for the West Coast, tangled up in blue, riders on the storm, somewhere over the rainbow, way up high. Fugitives.

We ended up in San Francisco, California. Sudsy got a job in a joint called “Rear View.” She waited on tables with the rear cheeks of her pants cut out. The place catered to men who called themselves “ass men.” I got a job picking up trash in Golden Gate Park. I had one of the sticks with a nail on the end and a big orange canvas bag. We were relatively happy. However, I had stopped having dreams about Sudsy’s butt and was worried that my feelings for her were waning.

I came home from work one day, and the place was surrounded by police. Sudsy was sticking her ass out the window and yelling taunts at the police over her shoulder: “Come and get me pigs!” “Dirty coppers.” I asked the cop by me what was going on. He told me she was wanted in New Jersey for killing some old lady wearing lipstick in her underwear, and leaning on a walker.

I started crying and got on my motorcycle and rode away. I needed time—years—to figure this out. Time will heal. . .


Definitions courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu.

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Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.


Where am I going? Where have I been? Goodbye American pie. I’ve been to the levy on the other side of Blueberry Hill where I learned how to use a bayonet to kill. It was a thrill. I was only nineteen. I came from a poor family. The Army was my salvation. The Army gave me each day my daily bread, but they would not forgive my trespasses or those who trespassed against me. The trespassers were the enemy. We tried our best to kill them with rifles, mortars, artillery, bombs, and, in my case, booby traps—an exploding edition of Mao’s Little Red Book was so effective. The Commies couldn’t resist, almost by impulse, picking it up. Beee-lam. What a mess. Luckily the Geneva Convention didn’t require post-mutilation clean up. It wasn’t hard to confirm their death. I just left what was left for the rats and maggots. When they blew up, we called it “This magic moment.” If I was working with a crew, when the explosion went off, the singing would commence from the bushes, everybody trying to outdo each other with hokey voices and exaggerated gestures. It was hilarious. As a nineteen-year-old, this was my first job. It wasn’t Burger King, it was blowing up VC and NVA. It was war, and that’s what you do in wars: you kill other human beings.

Two months after I got home, I was at Woodstock—the music festival. I did not talk to anybody ever about what I had done. I considered myself a murderer. I drank heavily, smoked a lot of pot and took a lot of acid. I think my brain became tie-dyed. I was “up on Cripple Creek, down by the river, over the rainbow, on the dark side of the moon.”

Then, I ran into a friend from high school who was a Vet. He told me about this thing called a “community college” where I could collect veteran’s benefits just for going to classes. I did it and loved it. That was just the start. Eventually, I earned a PhD in Chemistry and opened a meth lab in Idaho. I made millions, never got caught, and live quietly in San Francisco with my wife and my dog Bee-lam the eighth.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu

Buy a print version of The Daily Trope! The print version is titled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99. There is also a Kindle edition available for $5.99.

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.

When the going gets tough . . . . Got it? It’s time to help Sisyphus push that piece of crap up the hill to the garage. I can’t believe he bought a used KIA from one of those roadside rip-off car lots. He’s too vain to call a tow truck. This is his punishment.

But why the hell are we helping him? Hmmm–oh well: when in need . . .

Let’s go.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Buy a print version of The Daily Trope! The print version is titled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99 (or less). There is also a Kindle edition available for $5.99.

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.

There’s too much stuff piling up on the dining room table. Periodicals. Bills. Catalogs. Newspapers. Empty coffee mugs. Dead flowers. A bundt cake. Potato chips. Crackers. Empty wine bottle. And more.

We need to clear it off!

Who’s going to make the first move?

You help me, and I you.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Buy a print version of The Daily Trope! The print version is titled The Book of Tropes and is available on Amazon for $9.99 (or less).

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.

Yesterday, I shaved my head. Tough! Rough!

Uh oh!

Problem. Five o’clock shadow around bald spot.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.

I woke up in a used crib at the Salvation Army Family Thrift Store. All tucked in. 66 years old. Cold. For sale. I started crying. She called me “Ootsie Wootsie” and hit me with a lamp.

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

Ellipsis

Ellipsis (el-lip’-sis): Omission of a word or short phrase easily understood in context.

I gave a book to my daughter and my daughter, a book to me!

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Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)