Category Archives: adianoeta

Adianoeta: An expression that, in addition to an obvious meaning, carries a second, subtle meaning (often at variance with the ostensible meaning).

I went home to watch TV. I fixed a snack—pork roll on rye with lots of butter. I enjoyed cooking, but so far, all I could cook was pork roll. I cut my finger several times slicing it. I was presently thinking about funnel cake and going to work traveling with the circus. Maybe I would seem smart.

I wanted to seem smart. Some people are actually smart. Not me—the best I could do was seem—barely seem—smart. My first major strategy was to hang out with toddlers at “Dibby Day Care.” It was hard posing as a toddler. I got my toddler clothes at Salvation Army. I had a pair of shorts and a t-shirt with a duck on it. It said “Life is Ducky” on it. I had to pretend I couldn’t read it. I was kind of tall for day care, so I was given the boot. I threw a tantrum, but it didn’t work. I was out, standing on the curb in my toddler suit waiting for an Uber.

I had had an uneventful ride to my front door. I sat on the couch, took a bite of my pork roll sandwich, and flipped on the TV. My favorite show came on the TV. It’s what inspired me to join the circus—Mandrake the Magician. Sometimes he would work part time for Barnum & Bailey doing his magic show and solving circus crimes—like stolen clown noses, or the monkey’s pillbox hat, or admission-ticket forgery. When he solved a crime he would smile, twirl his mustache and say “Magic.” That day, that’s where I got my catch phrase: “Magic.” It floated into my head and cast its spell. Magic.

It had a positive connotation. But, I could shift it to the negative with a sarcastic tone. Now, I sounded in the groove. For example, my girlfriend would suggest we go to the movies and I would say “magic.” She would say “Ewww you’re so cool.” “Cool” is not the same “smart” but it may actually be better.

Now I have a small web-based business where I sell t-shirts and ball caps that say “MAGIC” on them. I am slowly getting rich. Mandrake the Magician has made it possible. It’s magic.

Definitions courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

The Daily Trope is available in an early edition on Amazon in paperback under the title of The Book of Tropes for $9.95. It is also available in Kindle format for $5.99.

Adianoeta: An expression that, in addition to an obvious meaning, carries a second, subtle meaning (often at variance with the ostensible meaning).

“Think about it.” Sometimes it was an invitation to wonder together. Other times it was an admonition focused on my failure to think about consequences. It was her favorite catch phrase—same words different meanings: one, a happy joining of mental resources, the other a painful put-down shattering my self-confidence.

I decided I needed a catch phrase too, so I could seem smart and win points by mimicking her “same words, different meanings” gambit. I nearly drove myself crazy. I saw how good irony could work—where I would mean the opposite of what I said. I could say “Your poetry is beautiful,” meaning “Your poetry sucks.” But, I was looking for a signature utterance that stood on its own as a dual-duty word or sentence.

I have a hearing problem and I say “what” a lot when I don’t hear what a person says. I realized that “what” said with a sarcastic tone, can express displeasure, or disbelief—a sort of critical jab at the speaker’s utterance fraught with negative nuances. Now, I made point of saying “What” with an ironic tone.

People started staying away from me because my intentions were unclear, and our conversations were fraught with mixed message—they didn’t know whether I didn’t hear or didn’t agree.

My girlfriend told me to think about it, and it wasn’t an invitation to wonder together—my “what” was an easy and dysfunctional way into the realm of dual meanings. I was ashamed. If I couldn’t do any better than “what” she was gone. She said again “Think about it,” and I did!

I went on a walking tour of the US. Each step I took, I tried to hit on a catch phrase with dual meanings. My shoes were wearing out and my money was running out. I had gotten half-way across Pennsylvania when some guy in a purple shirt wearing a straw hat, rode past me in a horse and buggy. I said to myself “Well Fu*k me! What the hell was that?” The guy in the buggy circled around and came back. He said “I will ride you to the bus stop.” I said, “Well, fu*k me, let’s go.”

We were clomping along to the bus stop, when I got it. After all the anguishing. After a simple episode, I found “Well, fu*k me!” as my saving catch phrase. It brought my own personal two meanings into my life and settled my heart. I was truly saved on the road to Altoona!

“We’ll fu*k me” can be an expression of joy and wonder. Or, it can be an expression of self- reproach. On the down side, its scope of use is limited. The “F” word makes it hard to use whenever you feel like it, unless you live in New York City, or anywhere in New Jersey. I lived in New Jersey!

My girlfriend thinks it’s brilliant. After a few glasses of wine she gives it a third meaning, a literal meaning that makes our time together meaningful and beautiful. Well, Fu*k me.

Definitions courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

The Daily Trope is available on Amazon in paperback under the title of The Book of Tropes for $9.95. It is also available in Kindle format for $5.99.

Adianoeta: An expression that, in addition to an obvious meaning, carries a second, subtle meaning (often at variance with the ostensible meaning).

Sometimes taking a figure of speech literally can be a good thing—not a sign of your lack of sophistication or cultural naïveté. It can actually be an opening to do the right thing.

I was at my girlfriend’s apartment. She was in the bedroom. She said “I’m burning for you.” I thought, “woo-wee, here we go!” Then, I smelled smoke. I ran into the bedroom and my girlfriend was literally burning for me. She had on a tiny little nighty, so the fire didn’t burn much. Also, I slapped her with a wet towel and killed the flames. Her burns were minimal—not life-threatening. They took her to the hospital for observation and “observed” that she was “off her rocker.” This diagnosis vexed me. Did it mean she had fallen off a rocking chair? I quickly rejected that interpretation. She did not have a rocking chair in her bedroom or anywhere Les in the apartment. My rhetoric professor told me about “An Etymological Dictionary of Cliches.” It tracks the origins of cliches, much like the OED does with words. it is best employed for the composition of wedding and anniversary speeches as well as eulogies, and even closing arguments courtroom speeches; events where cliches are expected and appreciated..

“Off your rocker,” I found, dates to 17th century England where rocking horses had become tokens of social status among aristocrats. “Rocking” was a culturally valued pastime. Some Princes and Barons would rock all day long, and into the night. They would eat on their rocking horse and there were built-in chamber pots, Servants were assigned to whinny from behind the rocking horses. The rocking horses were called rockers. Due to their construction, the rockers rocked very slowly. If one “fell off” his rocker it was quickly determined there was something wrong with him. If one was “off his rocker” due to his fall he could become agitated and push his rocker over. Eventually the “tantrum” was made the locus of meaning for being off one’s rocker, and eventually, it was universally employed as a cliche to refer to mental difficulties.

Now I understood—my girlfriend was crazy, and it did not matter that she did not have a rocker! If only I had taken “burning for you” literally, I might’ve gotten into her bedroom more quickly. But, I confess, I was trying to unwrap a condom in preparation for my “burning” girlfriend’s activities with me. This is a problem with language. Irony is the biggest offender, when for example you say “great job” when to mean “You bumbling idiot,” it makes me think some times, what if the Bible’s ironic? Yikes! That would turn the world upside down. But, the world is not flat, so it cannot be turned upside down. Ha ha!

I think I’m off my rocker.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

The Daily Trope is available on Amazon in paperback under the title of The Book of Tropes for $9.95. It is also available in Kindle format for $5.99.

Adianoeta: An expression that, in addition to an obvious meaning, carries a second, subtle meaning (often at variance with the ostensible meaning).

I had been sitting there for the past 2 minutes and I was dying to stroke her pussy. It was multicolored and silky. I had petted it once before but it swatted at me with claws out. Luckily, it didn’t get me or I’d probably have a scratch across my hand—it’s like my father told me: “Don’t try to play with pussies that don’t want to play with you.” But the problem is, you don’t know whether they want to play with you if you don’t try to play with them.

This pussy was named “Feckless” and she belonged to my friend Marie. The first time I asked if I could play with Marie’s pussy, she smacked me in the face and told me to get the hell out of her apartment—that we didn’t have that kind of relationship. When I explained the confusion, she apologized for giving me a bloody nose, and told me I could play with her pussy as much as I wanted. I tried to pick up Feckless to stroke her, and like today, and the time before, she let me have it full blast, but this time she got me. I had to go to the emergency room. They laughed when I told them I was scratched by a pussy. Then and there I decided I would call pussies “cats.”

I have no idea where the pussy thing came from and why it took me so long to get it straightened out. You would think that Marie’s slap in the face would’ve woken me up, and to some extent it did. Then my football coach started calling me a pussy. He called me a pussy because I wasn’t interested in killing people from the other team. My teammates wouldn’t hesitate to stomp on the opposition’s throats, stomachs or crotches with their spikes. The crotch stomps did little damage due to the protection worn down there—but throats and stomachs were wonderfully vulnerable. When Coach called me a “pussy” I would meow at him and he would throw me off the field. I’d hiss at him as I headed for the locker room. I decided I didn’t want to be a pussy and I quit the team.

I became a “cat”—a “cool cat.” I grew my hair long with sideburns and started wearing blue jeans. I said “man” and “cool” all the time. I got a switchblade knife and motorcycle boots. Not only was I a cat, I was a stud. I joined a gang named “The Rabid Cats.” I participated in some petty crime and inconsequential gang fights. We fought it out with “Satan’s Halos” with bean bags and nerf guns. That’s when I decided to go back to my normal life.

I went looking for Marie, hoping that something would blossom between us. I found her. She had a baby. She said, “I never should’ve let that bastard stroke my pussy.”

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

The Daily Trope is available on Amazon in paperback under the title of The Book of Tropes for $9.95. It is also available in Kindle format for $5.99.