Chiasmus (ki-az’-mus): 1. Repetition of ideas in inverted order. 2. Repetition of grammatical structures in inverted order (not to be mistaken with antimetabole, in which identical words are repeated and inverted).
We are friends—pals are us! We had known each other forever. We met in college, married two sisters and started a small business. We made electric dog washers. For our patent, we adapted a treadmill to dog-washing. The treadmill was surrounded by nozzles that alternately sprayed soap and warm water, and at the end of the cycle, blow dryed the dog. The water came from a hose hooked up to the nozzles.
We manufactured them in five sizes—mini to jumbo. An added bonus was the exercise your dog got while taking a bath. Some people used them for their miniature horses and burros. We named the pet washers “Tread Baths “ and eventually had franchises throughout the United States. Our work, at this point, consisted of overseeing manufacturing and opening envelopes and depositing checks. The franchises did not include repairs and maintenance —that was the customers’ responsibility.
We would tour sites to make sure they were projecting the right image. We had a “collector” named Lumbo who took care of customers who missed more than two payments. Lumbo was a former “fixer” for the mob. He was so scary, usually one visit yielded back payments. He wore brass knuckles on both hands and asked customers if they would like to write a check from a hospital bed. He was incredibly effective as a collector. We paid him half of what he collected. It worked well for everybody but the customers in arrears. In some cases he would repossess the custumer’s tread bath. He and his partner Fredo would load it in the van and drive it home. Frequently, customers would be “injured” helping to load the van.
We’re currently working on a new project. It’s a combination microwave oven and phone, iPad, lalaptop charging station. The charging station is built into the microwave, framing it on one sides with cellphone holsters, and on top with a laptop dock, and on the bottom with an iPad dock The item being charged plugs in via the holster or dock. We’ve been beta-testing the product for six months and it looks like a go! We’re calling it the “The Cook ‘n Dock,” not too clever, but fairly explanatory. Just think— no more tangled wires or overused outlets. Just plug in while you’re cooking that frozen dinner and you’ll be up to 60% while you’re on your third glass of wine.
The Cook ‘n Dock will be manufactured in Greenland and retail for $395.95.
