Orcos


Orcos (or’-kos): Swearing that a statement is true.


Liars are the lowliest form of human life. They tear the social fabric like it is cheesecloth. Once that fabric is torn, unmoored, set loose from trust, the essence of human relations is undermined, and when lying becomes endemic, paranoia sets in. When you ask anybody anything, if it makes them look better, they’ll lie—ask them how old they are, they’ll shave off five years. Ask them where they got all that cash. They’ll tell you from gambling.

I am not a liar and that’s the truth. That wasn’t a lie. Neither was that. Or that. I won the money gambling, or I inherited it, or something like that. I have receipts and other documents supporting the truthfulness of what I’m swearing to. So, while I could be lying, I swear I’m not. It’s like when I tell my wife I love her, there’s no way of proving it. Same with the money. Even though the same amount is missing from the place where I work, it is a coincidence, like if my wife saw me coming out of a motel with my secretary. My wife would say, “Oh gosh. What a coincidence that is. They must’ve been working away from the office.”

I am an honorable man like Julius Caesar, or Huey Long, or Donald Trump. Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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