Daily Archives: March 31, 2022

Metabasis

Metabasis (me-ta’-ba-sis): A transitional statement in which one explains what has been and what will be said.


It you will, if you count to ten, you will see a metaphorical rainbow. Yes, that’s right. I told you about the phenomenon in great detail, setting out the prior conditions, their necessity, and the eerie music that must be playing to prepare your brain like a 10 pound turkey to be basted with truth and stuffed with wisdom. Next, I will explain how the metaphorical rainbow operates to endow you with an angelic halo, another metaphor hovering above your head, like a swarm of luminescent bees or flies—it depends on your body odor. If you smell like a flower, you get bees. If you smell like garbage or dog-do, you get flies.

I know this next phase of your spiritual journey is complicated and vexing. Be patient, what’s next will be truly mind bending. And once you’ve achieved “Bent Mind Hood” every word will become a metaphor, and you will lose your grip. Clutching and squeezing will never again be goals. Ok. Let us begin by singing Bon Jovi’s “Wanted Dead or Alive.” Then, we’ll have some delicious Kool Aid.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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