Daily Archives: November 16, 2021

Assumptio

Assumptio (as-sump’-ti’o): The introduction of a point to be considered, especially an extraneous argument. 

See proslepsis (When paralipsis [stating and drawing attention to something in the very act of pretending to pass it over] is taken to its extreme. The speaker provides full details.).


I do not want to hurt my Mommy and don’t want to talk about how she bought me an AR-15 for my birthday, even though I was underage to possess one in Illinois. I didn’t know why, but Mommy drove me to a riot with my gun. Before we left for the riot, she loaded the gun’s magazines and helped me get into my militia suit—black with a lot of cool camo buckles.

When we got to the riot in Wisconsin, Mommy told me to “Get the f*ck out of the car.” As I stood there she yelled, “Lock, load and shoot somebody Kyle. I didn’t buy you the gun so you could model it in the middle of the street!” I started to cry and the gun went off and somebody fell down. Through my tears I saw another blurry figure coming at me and the gun went off again. Mommy yelled “That’s only two you feeble idiot!” I was crying so hard I was afraid my camo buckles would rust, but I didn’t want a spanking when we got home. My gun went off again and there was somebody shot in the arm. Mommy drove off. I walked away and phoned Mommy. She didn’t answer so I walked back to Illinois.

I’m not saying that Mommy is to blame for everything. A son’s love for his mother is boundless. When you arrest Mommy, please don’t mention me. I’m just a teenager.


Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu). 

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