Eucharistia (eu-cha-ris’-ti-a): Giving thanks for a benefit received, sometimes adding one’s inability to repay.

Thank-you so much for the chocolate hockey puck, the six-pack of multi-colored erasers, and the sheet of 100 Pokémon press-on tattoos. It isn’t even my birthday! It isn’t even Christmas, or any other common holiday. But, digging deep into my knowledge of folklore and the history of holidays, I know what day this is: International Odd-Shaped Mole Day.

This is my ticket to being feted today: my dark brown 2-inch mole protruding from my forehead. It is hairy and looks like a Hyena running up an ant mound. Usually my mole is noted as a site of teasing and ridicule. I’m used to being called hyena head and having people ask to touch the mole or take a picture. It has gotten so bad that I have to wear a big Band Aid to cover over it, or a watch cap pulled nearly over my eyes. These measures generally work, but when I run into somebody I know, I become the brunt of their teasing—they may rip off my Band Aid, or pull off my cap all the while taunting me. Crowds will often gather, sometimes chanting “hyena head, hyena head” as they circle around me like Medieval villagers in a Gothic novel.

But today is my day! You wonderful people have invited me here to celebrate my odd-shaped mole. For awhile, you’ve made me feel normal; even better than normal. I can never repay you, but, if you like, you can line up to touch my mole and take a picture.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (

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