Paramythia (pa-ra-mee’-thi-a): An expression of consolation and encouragement.

I’m so sorry your son Jr. is giving drug-fueled speeches on your behalf. It’s like having an overflowing porta-potty on your otherwise gleaming sweet-smelling team. But you’ve been through worse—Stormy Daniels is your benchmark for the bottom, and you got through that with only a scratch. Oh, we can’t forget the impeachments—they didn’t make a dent. Oh yes—and the kids in cages at the border: hardly a ripple. Really, the only thing slowing you down is the truth. Just keep telling lies, the bigger the better, and you’ll be our first Dictator by the end of August. Relax and enjoy the sidelines for a little while. Everything’s going to be ok.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (

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