Daily Archives: March 7, 2020

Hysterologia

Hysterologia (his-ter-o-lo’-gi-a): A form of hyperbaton or parenthesis in which one interposes a phrase between a preposition and its object.  Also, a synonym for hysteron proteron.

I went over–flying like a mangled frisbee–the huge bump in the road called Thrill Hill. I must’ve lifted three feet off the pavement. Sparks flew from the car’s rocker panels when I landed. I immediately turned the car around to have another go. I was under–the stakes were high–no illusions that I might wreck my car or get arrested, or something worse. But I was an inveterate thrill seeker. It ran in my family. It was in my blood.

That’s when I saw her standing by the side of the road waving a flashlight back and forth, beckoning me to take another run over Thrill Hill. She was almost transparent with golden hair. She was wearing what looked like a veil made into a dress. Her lips were red and were dripping red. “Oh my God!” I yelled, “It’s the Fury of the Hill beckoning me to my death.”

I took her challenge, and I wouldn’t be writing this if I had died.  No sir. I am slightly transparent now and wear overhauls made from a veil. I help the fury. I put, for the sake of safety, new batteries in the flashlight every night. I also do our laundry, which isn’t much. Also, I tidy up after she eats her latest unfortunate victim(s).  She tells me that someday I’ll get to wave the flashlight. Until then, I am quite satisfied with the way things are.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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