Periergia (pe-ri-er’-gi-a): Overuse of words or figures of speech. As such, it may simply be considered synonymous with macrologia. However, as Puttenham’s term suggests, periergia may differ from simple superfluity in that the language appears over-labored.
He looked like a baseball bat. He smelled like a two-day old taco. He was like a bungee chord that had lost its elasticity. He was like a raccoon on crack. He was like a jackhammer with a leak in his air-hose. He was a tornado. He was lighting bolt. He was a tsunami. He was an asshole.
He was my father.
He always had a lesson for me to learn. For courage, he put me in a cage with a huge Pit Bull and gave me a rock to defend myself with. Luckily, I had the remains of a baloney sandwich in my backpack. I made friends with the Pit Bull. I survived.
To teach me to endure pain, he threw me naked into a tub full of live lobsters. They pinched the hell out of me, then, we invited a few friends over and ate them. I was covered with red pinch marks, but I enjoyed the feast.
To teach me to think for myself, he put me in a room with three doors. Unbeknownst to me behind Door 1 was an alligator. Behind Door 2 was a grizzly bear. Behind Door 3 was my mother yelling “Choose me! Choose me!” My choice was obvious. I chose Door 1 and lost three fingers on my right hand. Luckily, the alligator had been recently fed. I learned nothing, except how to function with a missing pinky and ring finger.
One last example: To teach me to be humble, he rented 10 monkeys to hurl their shit at me for 30 minutes. When covered with shit, I felt sick, not humble.
I learned more when I was asleep than I did under the tutelage of my father.
He was locked up for abuse when I was 16. Now, he’s being taught a lesson.
The Daily Trope 