Distributio (dis-tri-bu’-ti-o): (1) Assigning roles among or specifying the duties of a list of people, sometimes accompanied by a conclusion. (2) Sometimes this term is simply a synonym for diaeresis or merismus, which are more general figures involving division.

OK, we’ve got another rally scheduled somewhere for next week. As you know, you will be my key people in its management. I know you’ll make this one a regular Nurnberg!

Rep. Greene, you’re in charge of signage—making and delivering signs on sticks to be displayed by our faithful followers. All I ask is that you don’t use the word “hump” on any of them. Beyond that, anything goes so long as it’s a little whacky and expresses our beliefs. At least one-third of them should claim I won the election and another third should support my candidacy in the next Presidential election. The rest of them can be the lies I keep telling about the Pandemic, the Mexican invasion, January 6, and Hunter Biden.

Junior, you and your brother are in charge of security. All those hunting trips I paid for are coming to fruition. Whatever you do, don’t shoot any interlopers and hecklers. Just aim your hunting rifles at them a yell “shut up or else!”

Ivanka, you will bring me a cold Diet Coke whenever I snap my fingers. Make sure Jared stays home and plays with his Legos.

Senator Sinema, you’re on display as a notorious rogue Barbie Doll backstabber who loves me so much you’re willing to ignore the party that elected you. When I call you to the stage, you’ll walk on with a raised clenched fist in a red leather glove, like a Republican pro wrestler. I will hug you, and later, we’ll hook up at the after party. Melania’s visiting family in Slovenia, so we have nothing to fear.

OK! Let’s make this a winner! I make a good living off these rallies. Don’t let me down. Fire up the klieg lights!

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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