Pareuresis (par-yur-ee’-sis): To put forward a convincing excuse.

Hank, when I was diagnosed with cancer I panicked. Fearful of my family’s future, I started cooking meth to pay my medical bills and to save my family from financial ruin. I thought for sure that I was going to die. Who could have known? Now I’m nearly a billionaire, Skyler and I have a very successful carwash, and I’m totally cured of cancer.

Now, I have an offer to make.

How would you like 10-million dollars and a 50 percent stake in the car wash? Our families can have what they really deserve and we can quietly bring this nasty little episode in our lives to an end.

If you refuse, I’m going to have to give you a 100 percent stake in a bullet to the head.

What’ll it be Hank?

  • Post your own pareuresis on the “Comments” page!

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (

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