Diaskeue

Diaskeue (di-as-keu’-ee): Graphic peristasis (description of circumstances) intended to arouse the emotions.

Her baby was crying. It had been crying nonstop for five hours. It was 3 O’clock in the morning. She had to be to work at 7:00 am. She had to take a bus. Her husband had abandoned her and little Emile one month ago. He had run off with the 18-year old gymnast he had been giving guitar lessons to. Her mother had disowned her when she had married Morton. She was 22 and he was 45. Her mother was appalled by their age difference and threatened to take out a contract on Morton. Now that he had left her, she was threatening him again.

Morton worked in a MAGA hat factory on the outskirts of town owned by a state-run Chinese conglomerate: Moo Shoo Hat. Each hat came with a free set of chopsticks and a bar of jasmine soap. Morton was proud of himself—he believed he was making China great again—that the hats were turning China around—like opium did in the 19th century. In fact, he was thinking of selling fentanyl to help move things along—tucking it in the hats’ hatbands along with a coupon for a syringe from CVS. When the bosses found out about his scheme he was beaten, fired, and thrown out the factory’s back door. His pockets were full of fentanyl when the police found him. Morton is currently in jail awaiting trial.

“But that’s all behind me. Fu*k Morton and his girlfriend too—who, by the way, ran out on him when he bottomed out. Anyway— I’ve got to figure out how to get to work. Finally, baby Emile shut up and I put her into her crib. I set my alarm for 5.00 am and went to sleep. I woke up crying. I opened my window and held baby Emile out the window. I yelled ‘I’ll drop my baby if you don’t take care of her today, for free!’ People just looked at me with scolding looks. I live on the first floor, so my threat didn’t have much traction. Then, a man with a seeing-eye dog yelled ‘Throw me the baby. I can help.’ Without thinking, I threw baby Emile at him. He said ‘I was just kidding’ as my baby flew through the air. Suddenly, a young man in a Brooklyn Rampage baseball uniform jumped up and caught my baby. He came inside and promised to take care of my baby, and I made it to work. I was going to permanently hire him when I got home, and I did.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

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