Asphalia

Asphalia (as-fay’-li-a): Offering oneself as a guarantee, usually for another.

I have been a fry-cook for 22 years. I’ve flipped more burgers than any single McDonalds, Burger King, or Wendy’s. Ok, that’s an exaggeration, but it is close to true. I taught Elrond, my son, all he knows, and I believe his prowess as a fry-cook surpasses mine. In addition to burgers, he can do omelettes and steaks, and oysters, and much, much more. Additionally, Elrond is easy-going and gets along well with other people.

I hope you would consider him for the fry-cook position that just opened. I will mentor him and see to it that he does well. I’ve been working here for the past 9 years. I know I’ve earned your trust. If Elrond does not work out, I’ll resign. I am confident that won’t happen, but I swear I will leave.

See you later!

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).

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