Asteismus (as-te-is’-mus): Polite or genteel mockery. More specifically, a figure of reply in which the answerer catches a certain word and throws it back to the first speaker with an unexpected twist. Less frequently, a witty use of allegory or comparison, such as when a literal and an allegorical meaning are both implied.
1957
He: I thought we could make-out up in my bedroom while my mom and dad watch Lawrence Welk on Tv.
I want to try French kissing, and I think the time is right. We might as well be going steady. It’s time to expand our repertoire
She: I woud rather watch Lawrence Welk than make out with you.
The only thing going steady here is your relentless efforts to get me to capitulate to your fantasies. I didn’t mind sucking the opposite ends of a piece of spaghetti together, or slow dancing together in your rec-room, or holding hands on a walk. I did mind some of the other things you asked me to do— “Will you pull on my Johnson please?” almost killed our relationship, especially when I asked my dad what a “Johnson” is. I was grounded for a week. So, let’s forget about this French kissing right now before I go home to escape your weirdness.
He: I’m going to tell you about French kissing whether you like it or not: when we French kiss, we stick our tongues in each other’s mouths and lick each other’s tongues while moving our heads back and forth a little. It is a very rewarding experience far superior to plain kissing.
She: Ok. I’ll try it.
POSTSCRIPT
They kissed and kissed and kissed. After about two minutes he asked her to pull on his Johnson. She pushed him away, yelled “Pig!” and went home and masturbated.
Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu).
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