Sententia


Sententia (sen-ten’-ti-a): One of several terms describing short, pithy sayings. Others include adageapothegemgnomemaximparoemia, and proverb.

“Never a lender nor a borrower be.”

Adhering to the advice above has kept me poor, frustrated, and lonely all of my life.

It all started when I joined the Mega-Jesus Church of the Resurrected Saint Petersburg Anointed With Light and Gold Rolex Watches and Small Weapons. The Pastor is Father Doctor Reverend Excon O’Bail. It was the way he pointed a loaded pistol at the congregation (often at me) and yelled, “Ok you lost parasites, it’s time to make your offering. If it’s under a grand your goin’ outta here in a rubber bag.”

Now I own only my underwear, shoes, a suit, a bicycle, and a Rev. Excon Specially Formulated Bible. I have a decent job, but my family is estranged. My parents disowned me years ago and my brother Bill is trying to have me put away. My sister, who is a budding writer, wants me to tell her my “story” so she can write a book and “become famous.”

I just want to continue counting my blessings. I have faith that I will get past zero someday and claim the beautiful rewards promised by Rev. Excon.

Definition courtesy of “Silva Rhetoricae” (rhetoric.byu.edu)

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